Showing posts with label script. Show all posts
Showing posts with label script. Show all posts

Friday, February 14, 2014

Adios

“Luna, what have you done?”

“Nothing.”

“I liked that girl!”

“I think that was part of the problem.”

“Pretty sure she’s never coming back.”

“Good.”

“Dammit, Luna! You had no right to chase her off.”

“Well I did and I’d do it again, so there.”

“If I want to see someone, I should be able to do so without you freaking the fuck out.”

“You should be able to, but you can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Because I like you.”

“Don’t go there.”

“Fine.”

“Stop pouting.”

“I wasn’t the one that chased off your stupid girlfriend, anyway. It was Asa.”

“What does that prick have to do with this?”

“Him and I were fighting at his place and she walked in.”

“What the hell was she doing at his place?”

“That’s what I wanted to know! But instead of asking, I just started strangling her.”

“God, Luna.”

“Then Asa came up from behind and I thought he was going to pull me off but he grabbed her ass instead.”

“What!”

“She got mad and started kicking. That’s when I let go. Asa apologized for his little ‘mishap’ but she wasn’t buying it and kicked him in the balls.”

“Fuck, yes.”

“So I hit her over the head with my purse.”

“Grrrrrr.”

“She pushed me over the couch and left. We’ll hope for good.”

“I am so pissed off right now.”

“It’s okay sir, she wasn’t really your type.”

“Oh and what is my type?”

*wink*

“Get out of here, Luna.”

“Why?”

“Michael’s home.”

Friday, February 7, 2014

Told You So


“Hi Luna!”

“What the fuck! Jordon? Is that you?”

“Yes, it is.”

“But you’re supposed to be dead!”

“I know.”

“How did you get in here?”

“I’ve missed you, Luna.”

“Get the fuck away from me!”

“Whoa! You carry a gun now? Put it away babe, you’re scaring me.”

“Stop right there or I’ll blow your fucking head off.”

“You don’t really mean it, do you?”

“I do.”

“Well, I guess there’s just one way to...”

BANG!

Thursday, February 6, 2014

Almost There

Luna was headed to Asa’s and she almost made it there but Alex caught up from behind. He took her hand and wouldn’t let go. She tried to put up a fight.


The night was cold, she finally gave up and Alex walked her home. Asa watched from a darkened room, through the scope on his gun. 

Wednesday, February 5, 2014

Black Eye

Luna to Alex:


“Oh my god, your eye! What happened?”

“Nothing. Don’t worry about it.”

“Does it hurt?”

“Ouch, yes! Don’t touch it Luna.”

“Did you and Asa get in a fight?”

“I don’t get in fights, Luna. He just walked up and punched me.”

“Oh, sorry.”

“Your crush on him is maddening, girl.”

*sigh*

*dirty look*

“I’ll go get you some ice.”

“Don’t bother.”

“It looks like it hurts!”

“Stop touching it! What the hell is wrong with you? Do you like it when I poke you in the eye?”

“Ow! What the fuck was that for?”

“Watch your language.”

“You are in a horrible mood.”

“I wonder why.”

“I think it’s time for a drink.”

“No thanks.”

“I meant for me but I’ll bring you back some ice.”

“Luna, I’m fine just do me a favor. Go and don’t come back. I’m not in the mood for your company.”

“You don’t really mean that. Do you?”

“Please don’t give me that look.”

“I can’t believe you’re mad at me!”

“I never said I was...”

“Don’t worry. I’ll leave you alone, promise.”

“Where are you going?”

“To go get drunk… with Asa!”

“You to stop right there!”

*door slam*

"God dammit.”

Tuesday, February 4, 2014

Bad Behavior

Alex to Asa:

“Where are you headed with Luna?”

“None of your damn business.”

“Luna, where is he taking you?”

“Don’t answer that. Get in the car.”

“Luna, you’re supposed to be at my place in an hour.”

“And she will be! What the fuck is wrong with you?”

“Why don’t you just answer the question?”

“Fuck off. I don’t answer to you.”

“Get out of the car, Luna.”

“Don’t you dare. Alex, get the fuck out of the way! I have no problem running your ass over.”

“Luna, get out of the car before he runs me over.”

“You stay there female or I guarantee I will.”

“Rev up your car all you want, asshole!”

“Luna, I hate that mother fucker. You don’t mind if I run him over… do you?”

Michael:  

“What the fuck is going on here? Asa, turn that off. 
Luna, come here and Alex, please stop keying Asa’s car.”

Sunday, February 2, 2014

Cheeky


Michael:

“Luna, that skirt is a little short. Don’t you think?”

“I don’t know, can you see my ass?”

“Yes I can.”

“It’s perfect then.”

“You’re not leaving in that.”

“Yes I am.”

“Fine but I’m adding a handprint.”

“What?!”

“You heard me.”

“Grrr, fine I’ll go change.”

         ~~~~~~

Asa:

“Luna you’re late, let’s go.”

“Sorry.”

“Hold on. That skirt is a little short, don’t you think?”

“But I wore it just for you!”

“Dammit, Luna. I can’t take you out in that.”

“Why not? I thought you liked my ass.”

“I do. It’s the handprint I can do without.”

Monday, January 27, 2014

Peepholes


 Michael:

“Luna! Where the hell are you going?”

“Nowhere.”

“What’s in your bag? It’s so heavy you can barely stand.”

“Nothing.”

“Bring it here. Good lord. What are you doing with all these power tools?”

“I’m using them to fix things, you know… things that need fixin’.”

“I don’t like the sounds of this.”

“Well, I wanted to keep it a surprise.”

“Oh, I bet you did. Go put them back where you found them.”

“Fine.”

“Luna, you’re going the wrong way.”

"Dammit."

~~~~~~

Alex:

“Luna! What are you doing?”

“I just installed a peephole in your door!”

“You just drilled a hole through my door and that’s it.”

“I know! You’re welcome.”

“Where are you going now?”

“Off to drill a couple for Asa.”

“Carry on then.”

~~~~~~

Michael:

“I thought I told you to put those tools away.”

“I’m headed there right now, promise.”

“Luna, what have you been up to all this time?”

“I installed a peephole in everyone’s door!”

“Everyone’s door?”

“Yup!”

“About four and a half feet up?”

“Of course!”

“Fuck.”

“Okay well if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go put these tools away now.”

“Luna?"

"Yes sir?"

"You’re going the wrong way.”

Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Bad Santa

Alex: 

“So Luna, have you been a good girl for Santa this year?”

“Fuck no and why would you even ask.”

“He left you a present.”

“Ooh, give it to me!”

“Wait a minute. It doesn’t sound like you deserve it.”

“Well that wasn’t very nice. It sounds like Santa wanted me to have it or he wouldn’t have given it to you to give to me. So, hand it over.”

“Hey, maybe it’s for me! I just assumed it was for you since it was addressed to my little angel. I didn’t think Santa would be so mushy with me but I guess it’s possible.”

“It’s not for you. Give it here.”

“No. You’re being a brat.”

“Fine then I’ll go back to singing x-mas carols.”

“X-mas carols indeed. Take your present.”

“Oh yay! For me? You shouldn’t have.”

“I didn’t, trust me.”

“Oh look, earrings!”

“Nipple clips.”

“What?”

“Nothing. Try them on, Luna.”

“Ow! These earrings aren’t very nice.”

“I think it’s safe to say Santa bought those for you.”

“I take it I’m expected to wear these to the dinner party tonight?”

“Absolutely not!”

“Good, I’m not sure what Santa was thinking.”

"Me neither and that is the last time I offer to deliver a present."

Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Mission Accomplished

Alex:  “What the hell did you say that for?”

Luna:  “I’m sorry.”

“No, you get back here. Sorry doesn’t cut it this time.”

“I didn’t mean it!”

“Then you shouldn’t have said it.”

“I take it back.”

“Too late.”

“Ow!”

“Explanation yourself.”

“You don't have to be so rough.”

“I barely have a hold of you. Answer me.”

“I said it to get a reaction, I suppose.”

“Mission accomplished.”

“Ouch!”

"I am not hurting you."

"You're scaring me."

“You wanted a reaction and you got one. I'm angry now. Are you happy?”

“No.”

“Good.”

“I told you I didn’t mean it.”

“Words are powerful things, Luna. They’re weapons and you know it. I put up with a lot of bullshit from you but this time you've gone too far. You should have thought twice before telling me…”

Michael: “What's going on in here?”

Alex: “Nothing. I was just leaving.”

Saturday, December 14, 2013

Stars

Alex:
“Luna, you look cold
Come here
That’s right
Climb inside my jacket
The wind has picked up
And put a chill in the air
Are you getting warmer?
I can feel your hands
Little lady
They’re frozen
We’ll go home soon
Promise
I just want to stay
A little bit longer
The stars are amazing tonight
And the moon is so bright
It stands out like you do
My dear
In a room full of pinpricks
Come on
Don’t fall asleep Luna
Look at the sky
There’s a star just waiting
To fall for you.
Ha!
Did you see it?
A falling star!
You saw it didn’t you?
Fantastic!
What are the odds
Okay well
I guess we can go now
Sorry if you’re cold
What’s that?
You want to stay?
Alright then
But just a little bit longer
Luna
What are you doing
Hey hey hey
Let go of my belt!
Knock that off
Knock it off, Luna
Or I’ll take you straight home 
Luna
I’m not kidding
God you’re persistent
Fine
Go get in the car
And thanks a lot
For the hard-on
Luna
God dammit.”

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Baby It's Cold Outside

Alex:

“Luna, what are you doing?”

“I’m bored.”

“I can tell. Stop playing with my hair.”

“Do you think those Christmas carolers will ever come back?”

“Probably not and that was embarrassing.”

“I was just dancing, the only way I know how.”

“You put the ‘ass’ in holiday classics.”

“Let’s go caroling!”

“No way.”

“…I really should go…”

“Please, don’t start singing.”

“…I really can’t stay…”

“Just be quiet and sit down.”

“…This evening has been…”

“Not on my lap!”

“…So very nice…”

“Grrr.”

“…Michael will start to worry…”

“Speaking of him, he’ll be home at any moment.”

“…Asa will be pacing the floor…”

“Fuck that asshole.”

“…So really I’d better scurry…”

“At least get off my lap.”

“…But maybe just a half a drink more…”

“That is the last thing you need.”

“…I ought to say no, no, no sir....”

“That would be a first.”

“…At least I’m gonna say that I tried…”

“Hmph.”

“…I really can’t stay…”

“Good then get off my lap.”

“…But it’s cold outside!”

Michael: “Luna, get off his lap.”

“Yes sir.”

Saturday, November 30, 2013

Spent

Asa: “Luna what did I tell you, right before I left?”

“To meet you at the casino?”

“That is NOT what I said and you know it.”

“Stop driving like an asshole, will you?”

“I’ll drive like an asshole if I want to.”

“Ouch! What did you pinch me for?”

“When I tell you to do something, you do it!”

“I can go to the casino if I want to.”

“No you can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Who’s that guy you were kissing on?”

“I don’t know, never met him before.”

“I catch you making out with a stranger and you want to question the rules?”

“I just wanted a cigarette.”

“Slut.”

“Ow! Stop pinching me.”

“I’m not very happy to be driving you home, female!”

“You didn’t have to drive me home, we could’ve stayed there.”

“Get out. Alex is waiting for you at the door.”

“Dammit! I never got to spend all the money he accidentally gave me.”

“Thief.”

“Learned it from you.”

“Give me the money.”

“But…”

“Give me the money!”

“Fine, here.”

“Good, now get out of the car.”

“But…”

“I said, get out of the car!”

“Where are you going?”

“Back to the casino to spend all this money you just accidentally gave me. Plus I want to meet your new boyfriend.”

“You’re an asshole.”

“OUCH! Hey bitch, you get back here!”

“Pinchy, pinchy!”

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Casino

Luna:  “Hi sir!”

Asa:  “Hey, babe.”

“That’s a very nice suit you have on. Is it new?”

“Yes it is. Don’t touch it.”

“It’s white.”

“You’re very observant.”  

“I just mean, I wouldn’t dare touch it.”

“Good. I’ll let you keep your fingers then.”

“I like the gold buttons.”

“They’re nice.”

“Matches your gold chain.”

“Yes it does.”

“And your gold teeth.”

“That’s enough, Luna.”

“Okay.”

“You talk too much, you know that?”

“I know. So, where are you going?”

“To the casino.”

“To gamble?”

“This time.”

“I don’t think they like you there.”

“That’s because I’m a winner and they don’t like winners there.”

“You’re also a cheater.”

“Again, with the talking too much.”

“Is that a new tattoo?”

“Yes it is. I got a couple new ones.”

“Cool.”

“I had this one done for you.”

“Oh my god.”

“Do you like it?”

“You got my name tattooed… on the inside of your wrist?”

“Yes I did, so don’t ever disappoint me.”

*silence*

“Fuck, I got to go. I’m running late.”

“I don’t think you should go.”

“Why not.”

“I don’t know. I just have a bad feeling.”

“Move it, you’re sitting on my gun.”

“Oh, sorry.”

“I’m out of here but listen up. Do not follow me. Don't wait up and don’t tell anyone about the gun. Got it?”

“Got it.”

“Goodbye, Luna.”

*door slam*

“Oh my god, he likes me. I need to find something to wear.”

*door opens*

“Don’t follow me Luna, I mean it!”

“Okay!”

*door slams*

“Something white to match his suit. Dammit, I love the casino.”

Monday, November 11, 2013

Escapee

Michael:

“Excuse me, Ma’am? Have you seen a young girl pass by? She’s short with long dark hair, wearing a black dress with…

She went that way? Thank-you.

Pardon me, Sir? Have you seen a young girl running around? She’s short with long dark hair, wearing a black dress with red boots…

She went in there? Are you kidding me? Fuck. If you’ll excuse me.

Hello there. It seems I would like a ticket to whatever is playing in this theatre. Thank-you. So what is playing tonight?

Great, judging by the look on your face I don’t even want to know.

Usher, excuse me but have you seen a young girl come through? She’s short with long black hair, wearing a black dress, red boots and a spiky leather collar.

Never mind, I see her. She’s climbing on stage and it appears I’ve bought a ticket to a male strip show. Excuse me.

Whoa lady! Hey, don’t be grabbing me there! Jesus, I got to get out of here, these chicks are crazy.

Damn. Guess I’ll just wait outside by the back door. They should be kicking her out at any...”

“Hi, sir!"

“Hello, Luna.”

Friday, November 8, 2013

Check Mate

Alex:  “Luna, this game is taking forever. Go, it’s your turn.”

“Fine.”

“That was a weird play.”

“I like to move the horse.”

“I’ve noticed.”

“It’s your turn. You’re holding up the game, sir.”

“Smart ass. Okay, there.”

“My turn!”

“That’s not a legal move, Luna.”

“There?”

“No.”

“What about there?”

“That’ll be just fine. My turn then.”

“Hey, you took my horse! You can’t take my horse, give it back!”

“That’s how the game works, Luna. I thought you knew how to play.”

“Take my stupid queen instead.”

“I don’t…”

“Switch me! I don’t like her and I want her off the damn board.”

“Is that why you’ve got her face down in the corner?”

“Yes. She’s crazy and I must keep her far, far away from the king who I plan to marry.”

“What?”

“Switch me.”

*sigh*

“Thank-you.”

“I think it’s time for lunch.”

“Are you forfeiting?”

“Yes, I guess I am.”

“Yippee, I won! I’m so smart and talented and pretty and wonderful and…”

“Shut up and help me put everything away.”

“Fine.”

“Hey, I saw that.”

“What?”

“You just put the queen in your pocket.”

“Did not!”

“Put it back.”

“Stupid queen, fine. I might have to let you go for now lady but one day, I will find you and strap you down and saw off your little...”

“Put it back!”

“Okay fine! ...here.”

“Thank-you.”

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Critics

Asa:  “Luna, what are you listening to? That’s awful, turn it off.”

“It’s classical music and this song is almost over.”

“I don’t care. Turn it off, now.”

“Thirty more seconds.”

“No more seconds!”

“Hey, give that back!”

“You had your chance.”

“Where are you taking it?”

“Back off.”

“Hey! What the fuck did you throw it out the window for?”

“Hehehe, that was fun.”

“It’s raining and you probably ruined it!”

“Where are you going, brat?”

“To go get it, thanks a lot. Asshole.”

“Get back here!”

“No, let go.”

“Stop fighting me.”

“No. Let go!”

“You’re mine now, you little bitch and you know what that means...”

Michael:  “What the fuck is going on in here?”

Asa:  “It’s Luna, she’s throwing a tantrum as well as her things out the window. I’m just trying to calm her down.”

Luna:  “Liar!”

“Luna calm down. Asa, let her go.”

“Yay! Finally. Now I can go get my stupid stereo.”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Because I said so.”

“That’s a stupid reason.”

“Because you’re mine and I make the rules around here. Don’t you forget it, young lady.”

Alex:  “Hello, um someone lost a stereo. Nearly hit me with it as I was coming up to the house and judging by the cd inside, this doesn’t belong to Asa.”

Luna:  “I did NOT throw my damn stereo out the window! Now give it back.”

Alex:  “No.”

“Why not.”

“Because you stole my cd.”

“Did not.”

“Did so.”

“Well if I did, then it must be mine so hand it over.”

“I've officially stolen it back.”

“God dammit, fine. But I really liked that cd.”

“You did?”

“Yes.”

“Really?”

“Yes!”

“Well, I guess I can let you borrow it a bit longer.”

“Why can’t I just have it?”

“Because it’s mine, Luna.”

“Fine but I think I might need a new stereo.”

Alex:  “Don’t look at me!”

“Okay then. Asa, I need a new...”

Asa:  “No fucking way.”

“Um sir, I think I need a new stereo.”

Michael:  “Luna?”

“Yes sir?”

“Why don’t you try playing the one you have?”

“Well what do you know, it works.”

Michael:  “God damn, Luna. I’m happy for you but that’s an awful song, turn it off.”

“Wait! It’s almost over.”

“Now!"

“Okay fine, sheesh.”

Thursday, October 31, 2013

Playtime

Michael: 

“Luna! Are you doing what I think you’re doing?”

“No.”

“Luna! We’re in public. Stop it.”

“No one can tell. Besides, it’s kind of fun.”

“Knock it off before someone sees you.”

“Does it bother you? To know what I’m doing?”

“Yes, it does and you’ve got three seconds to stop it before I tie your hands behind your back for the rest of the day.”

Asa:  “Hi there. Whoa Luna! Were you just doing what I think you were doing?”

“No!”

Michael:  “Yes.”

“Was not.”

“Get your fingers out of your mouth.”

Asa:  “Can we get out of this fucking store already?”

Michael:  “Good idea.”

Luna:  “Wait! No one’s bought me anything yet.”

Michael:  “God forbid. Well, this ought to do.”

Luna:  “I don’t have any use for a necktie.”

Michael:  “Yes you do...”

Asa:  “Nice. That’ll keep her hands from wandering.”

Luna:  “Oh, come on. This is stupid.”

Michael:  “Walk over to the register so I can pay for the tie.”

Luna:  “No way! And if you make me, I'll tell the dude exactly why my hands are tied behind my back.”

Asa:  “And another tie for the mouth. Saw that coming.”

Michael:  “Much better. Let’s get out of here."

Asa:  “Me fucking first.”

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Monday

Asa:  

“Luna, where is my secretary?”

“I dunno.”

“Liar.”

“She’s out on an errand.”

“You sent my secretary out on an errand?”

“There’s only room for one of us here.”

“Luna, I need my secretary. Go find her, I’ll be in my fucking office.”

*door slam*

“Whatever.”

*phone rings*

Luna:  “Hello! You have reached Asa’s office. He is currently unavailable, especially if you’re a lady. Please leave a message after the beep or not… um beep.”

Asa:  “Did you just answer my phone?”

“Of course not.”

“God dammit! Where the hell is my secretary?”

“I’m your secretary now, no sense in trying to fight it.”

“I’m only going to say this one more time, female. Get my fucking secretary back here or your ass is mine.”

*door slam*

“Whatever.”

*phone rings*

Luna:  (breathes hard, moans and hangs up)

Asa:  “GOD DAMMIT! That’s it, come here you little bitch.”

Luna:  “Oh, well look whose back! It’s your secretary. Hi there sweetheart, thank-you for the latte. Sorry about the blizzard outside. You don’t look so bad considering the walk. Asa wants to talk to you but I’ll warn you, he’s a little cranky this morning. Anyway, I’ll just leave you two alone to discuss how I got in here and how to prevent it from happening in the future. Bye-bye!”

*door slam*

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Halloween Party

Alex: “Luna? Is that you?”

“Yup! Hi sir.”

“That’s one hell of a costume you’re wearing.”

“I decided to be Cleopatra this year.”

“I thought you were going to be a drag queen.”

“Michael said no, he burnt my costume in a tiny fit of rage.”

“Told you that wouldn’t go over well.”

“He said he didn’t like me running around with a cock. He said it wasn’t very lady-like but I almost wore it anyway.”

“Is that why he grabbed your crotch in the parking lot?”

“Yes, what an asshole. It’s like he doesn’t even trust me.”

“Go figure.”

“By the way, your costume is boring sir.”

“I’m too old to dress up for Halloween.”

“You’re dressed up like a boring, old teacher that doesn’t know how to have any fun.”

“Let’s go bob for apples, Luna. You first, so I can help.”

“Ha ha ha, very funny. Hold my purse. I need to fix my costume.”

“I don’t want to hold your purse.”

“Careful, there are snakes in it.”

“Tell me you’re lying.”

“Can’t you feel them moving around?”

“Oh my God, Luna!”

“Hey, you dropped my purse! Come here my precious little babies.”

“Dammit! What the hell did you bring snakes to the party for?”

“They’re just my pets. I found them.”

“I don’t believe you. I think Cleopatra brought snakes to the party for a reason.”

“Trick or treat!”

“Luna.”

“Kidding.”

“Promise you’ll keep them in your purse.”

“If you’ll promise not to tell Michael I have ‘em.”

“One is trying to escape.”

“Oh hello there, little fella! What are you up to? …He’s just looking for the backseat of your car, sir. I’ll go show him the way.”

“LUNA!!!  Get back here! …Dammit. That girl can run fast in a pair of heels.” 

Saturday, October 19, 2013

Asa's Place

Knock knock knock.

*silence*

Knock Knock Knock!

*silence*

Pound! Pound…

“Luna, what the hell do you want?”

“Trick or treat!”

“What... in the fuck are you wearing?”

“My Halloween costume! I’m a drag queen. Do you like my boobs?”

“Stop jumping up and down.”

“They’re water balloons.”

“Great, Luna.”

“Hey, do you wanna make-out?”

“What?”

“Check out my package!”

“WHOA. Luna, what the fuck!”

“It’s another water balloon.”

“Christ. Does Michael know where you are?”

“Probably not.”

Michael: “There you are!”

“Crap.”

“I’ve been looking everywhere for you.”

“Tada! Here I am.”

“Luna, I already told you that is NOT an acceptable costume for tonight’s Halloween party. Go home and change.”

“But I worked really long… and hard… on this costume!”

“Don’t grab yourself like that.”

“Whoops, I have a wet spot. Think I might’ve sprung a leak in my weenie balloon.”

“Dammit, Luna!”

“Just kidding.”

“Get out of here!”

“What if I don’t want to go?”

“Asa? Get me a collar and leash off one of the dogs.”

“Gladly.”

“Never mind. Damn, that girl can run fast in heels.”