Saturday, November 30, 2013


Asa: “Luna what did I tell you, right before I left?”

“To meet you at the casino?”

“That is NOT what I said and you know it.”

“Stop driving like an asshole, will you?”

“I’ll drive like an asshole if I want to.”

“Ouch! What did you pinch me for?”

“When I tell you to do something, you do it!”

“I can go to the casino if I want to.”

“No you can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Who’s that guy you were kissing on?”

“I don’t know, never met him before.”

“I catch you making out with a stranger and you want to question the rules?”

“I just wanted a cigarette.”


“Ow! Stop pinching me.”

“I’m not very happy to be driving you home, female!”

“You didn’t have to drive me home, we could’ve stayed there.”

“Get out. Alex is waiting for you at the door.”

“Dammit! I never got to spend all the money he accidentally gave me.”


“Learned it from you.”

“Give me the money.”


“Give me the money!”

“Fine, here.”

“Good, now get out of the car.”


“I said, get out of the car!”

“Where are you going?”

“Back to the casino to spend all this money you just accidentally gave me. Plus I want to meet your new boyfriend.”

“You’re an asshole.”

“OUCH! Hey bitch, you get back here!”

“Pinchy, pinchy!”

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Candy From a Stranger

Luna went to the casino, on a mission to hunt down Asa. She got distracted along the way.

“Ooh, is that a bar? I could go for a drink right now. Kinda nervous.

Oh, dear lord. Will you look at that man talking to the bartender.

He looks filthy rich. Bet he’ll buy my drink, they always do. Time to order something nice.

Asshole. He didn’t buy my drink. Good thing I stole plenty of money from Alex.

Really? Now this guy wants to know my name? Should’ve bought my drink, mister.

Hey buddy, let go!

Calm down? No, you calm down mother fucker!

Apology accepted, just because you’re cute. No, I don’t want to sit down.

Ouch! Okay fine I guess I’ll sit down. Who the hell does this guy think he is?

Great. I finally tell him my name but he won’t tell me his. What a prick.

He’s a good looking prick though, damn. Smells so fine. Got me sticking around for no good reason.

I need a cigarette. Pretty sure he'll give me one.

What a bastard! He wants a kiss for a cigarette.

You know, I have no problem with that.




Please never let this moment end.

Who the fuck is tapping on my shoulder?

Oh shit.

It's Asa.”

Wednesday, November 20, 2013


Luna:  “Hi sir!”

Asa:  “Hey, babe.”

“That’s a very nice suit you have on. Is it new?”

“Yes it is. Don’t touch it.”

“It’s white.”

“You’re very observant.”  

“I just mean, I wouldn’t dare touch it.”

“Good. I’ll let you keep your fingers then.”

“I like the gold buttons.”

“They’re nice.”

“Matches your gold chain.”

“Yes it does.”

“And your gold teeth.”

“That’s enough, Luna.”


“You talk too much, you know that?”

“I know. So, where are you going?”

“To the casino.”

“To gamble?”

“This time.”

“I don’t think they like you there.”

“That’s because I’m a winner and they don’t like winners there.”

“You’re also a cheater.”

“Again, with the talking too much.”

“Is that a new tattoo?”

“Yes it is. I got a couple new ones.”


“I had this one done for you.”

“Oh my god.”

“Do you like it?”

“You got my name tattooed… on the inside of your wrist?”

“Yes I did, so don’t ever disappoint me.”


“Fuck, I got to go. I’m running late.”

“I don’t think you should go.”

“Why not.”

“I don’t know. I just have a bad feeling.”

“Move it, you’re sitting on my gun.”

“Oh, sorry.”

“I’m out of here but listen up. Do not follow me. Don't wait up and don’t tell anyone about the gun. Got it?”

“Got it.”

“Goodbye, Luna.”

*door slam*

“Oh my god, he likes me. I need to find something to wear.”

*door opens*

“Don’t follow me Luna, I mean it!”


*door slams*

“Something white to match his suit. Dammit, I love the casino.”

Monday, November 11, 2013



“Excuse me, Ma’am? Have you seen a young girl pass by? She’s short with long dark hair, wearing a black dress with…

She went that way? Thank-you.

Pardon me, Sir? Have you seen a young girl running around? She’s short with long dark hair, wearing a black dress with red boots…

She went in there? Are you kidding me? Fuck. If you’ll excuse me.

Hello there. It seems I would like a ticket to whatever is playing in this theatre. Thank-you. So what is playing tonight?

Great, judging by the look on your face I don’t even want to know.

Usher, excuse me but have you seen a young girl come through? She’s short with long black hair, wearing a black dress, red boots and a spiky leather collar.

Never mind, I see her. She’s climbing on stage and it appears I’ve bought a ticket to a male strip show. Excuse me.

Whoa lady! Hey, don’t be grabbing me there! Jesus, I got to get out of here, these chicks are crazy.

Damn. Guess I’ll just wait outside by the back door. They should be kicking her out at any...”

“Hi, sir!"

“Hello, Luna.”

Friday, November 8, 2013

Check Mate

Alex:  “Luna, this game is taking forever. Go, it’s your turn.”


“That was a weird play.”

“I like to move the horse.”

“I’ve noticed.”

“It’s your turn. You’re holding up the game, sir.”

“Smart ass. Okay, there.”

“My turn!”

“That’s not a legal move, Luna.”



“What about there?”

“That’ll be just fine. My turn then.”

“Hey, you took my horse! You can’t take my horse, give it back!”

“That’s how the game works, Luna. I thought you knew how to play.”

“Take my stupid queen instead.”

“I don’t…”

“Switch me! I don’t like her and I want her off the damn board.”

“Is that why you’ve got her face down in the corner?”

“Yes. She’s crazy and I must keep her far, far away from the king who I plan to marry.”


“Switch me.”



“I think it’s time for lunch.”

“Are you forfeiting?”

“Yes, I guess I am.”

“Yippee, I won! I’m so smart and talented and pretty and wonderful and…”

“Shut up and help me put everything away.”


“Hey, I saw that.”


“You just put the queen in your pocket.”

“Did not!”

“Put it back.”

“Stupid queen, fine. I might have to let you go for now lady but one day, I will find you and strap you down and saw off your little...”

“Put it back!”

“Okay fine!”


Tuesday, November 5, 2013


Asa:  “Luna, what are you listening to? That’s awful, turn it off.”

“It’s classical music and this song is almost over.”

“I don’t care. Turn it off, now.”

“Thirty more seconds.”

“No more seconds!”

“Hey, give that back!”

“You had your chance.”

“Where are you taking it?”

“Back off.”

“Hey! What the fuck did you throw it out the window for?”

“Hehehe, that was fun.”

“It’s raining and you probably ruined it!”

“Where are you going, brat?”

“To go get it, thanks a lot. Asshole.”

“Get back here!”

“No, let go.”

“Stop fighting me.”

“No. Let go!”

“You’re mine now, you little bitch and you know what that means...”

Michael:  “What the fuck is going on in here?”

Asa:  “It’s Luna, she’s throwing a tantrum as well as her things out the window. I’m just trying to calm her down.”

Luna:  “Liar!”

“Luna calm down. Asa, let her go.”

“Yay! Finally. Now I can go get my stupid stereo.”


“Why not?”

“Because I said so.”

“That’s a stupid reason.”

“Because you’re mine and I make the rules around here. Don’t you forget it, young lady.”

Alex:  “Hello, um someone lost a stereo. Nearly hit me with it as I was coming up to the house and judging by the cd inside, this doesn’t belong to Asa.”

Luna:  “I did NOT throw my damn stereo out the window! Now give it back.”

Alex:  “No.”

“Why not.”

“Because you stole my cd.”

“Did not.”

“Did so.”

“Well if I did, then it must be mine so hand it over.”

“I've officially stolen it back.”

“God dammit, fine. But I really liked that cd.”

“You did?”




“Well, I guess I can let you borrow it a bit longer.”

“Why can’t I just have it?”

“Because it’s mine, Luna.”

“Fine but I think I might need a new stereo.”

Alex:  “Don’t look at me!”

“Okay then. Asa, I need a new...”

Asa:  “No fucking way.”

“Um sir, I think I need a new stereo.”

Michael:  “Luna?”

“Yes sir?”

“Why don’t you try playing the one you have?”

“Well what do you know, it works.”

Michael:  “God damn, Luna. I’m happy for you but that’s an awful song, turn it off.”

“Wait! It’s almost over.”


“Okay fine, sheesh.”