Hammer

“Luna, what are you doing?”

“Oh hey Alex… um nothing.”

“Nothing my ass. What are you doing with a hammer?”

“This hammer? Oh you know…  hammering things.”

“Asa’s things?”

“Maybe.”

“As much as I hate that bastard I can’t let you do it.”

“Why not?”

“Because I’m not a dick. He asked me to give you this.”

“A new camera!” *gasp*

“I don’t know what this is about and I don’t want to know, but I want the hammer back.”

“Fine.”

“What else have you got on you?”

“That’s it!”

“Liar.”

“Whoa! Nothing like getting patted down first thing in the morning, nice!”

“Luna, what are you packing around a lighter for?”

“Um, I forgot.”

“…and why are there wood chips in your hair?”

“I dunno.”

“…and why do you smell like… like gasoline?”

*blank stare*

“WHY is the fire alarm going off now?”

“What?”

“WHY IS THE FIRE ALARM GOING OFF NOW, LUNA!”

“WHAT?”

“WHY IS THE… WIPE THAT FUCKING GRIN OFF YOUR FACE AND GET OUTSIDE!”

“FINE!”

“YOU’RE IN DEEP SHIT, LUNA!”

“FIGURED!”

“JUST MEET ME OUTSIDE AND DON’T GO RUNNING OFF ANYWHERE!”

“…BUT I WANT TO GO TAKE PICTURES!”

“YOU WILL DO NO SUCH THING!”

“TRY AND STOP ME! HAHAHAHAHA!”

“YOU ASKED FOR IT.”

“OUCH, SHIT GOD DAMN MOTHER FUCKER! I WAS JUST KIDDING. HEY! GIVE ME BACK MY CAMERA!”

“NO. LET GO!”

“NOOOOOO! GOD DAMMIT! IT’S MINE! GIVE IT BACK!”

“OUCH! DAMMIT LUNA! …DID YOU JUST BITE ME?!”

“HA! GOT IT!”

“GET BACK HERE!”

“NO FUCKING WAY!”

“PUT THE HAMMER BACK LUNA! GOD DAMMIT, GET BACK HERE! …Fuck. It’s no use, she’s gone.  It’s not even eight in the morning and I got to deal with this shit. Poor girl. I’ve had enough, time to play dirty.”